When we’re looking at this idea of leading and following, giving and receiving, it’s maybe normal to think of the idea of how a leader is like a boss, and then the follower is like an employee, servant, who works for the boss.
So if you look at it this way, the employee or servant is giving, and the boss is receiving.
So that the idea of then leadership is then connected with taking, and followership is connected with giving.
But it seems like maybe this is an incomplete picture.
Because what kind of a boss is it who simply takes and does not give? It seems like a completer picture of this relationship is that really the leader should be giving as well.
A leader who’s not giving anything and just taking sounds a lot like a tyrant, and somebody that maybe they’re ruling because, you know, other people are afraid to challenge their power.
Maybe they rule through some kind of threat of force, or maybe more likely a threat of poverty.
They control the money.
You do what I say, and I give you some money.
So in that case they’re giving, but it’s a very restricted kind of giving, where you know, I just give you this money that I have, but otherwise you’re simply working for me.
But it seems like a more complete picture of a leader: a leader should not just be taking from people working under him.
A leader should be giving as well.
And what makes really a good leader is somebody that is actually somehow serving the people, serving others, giving to them.
And similarly, the people working in the position of a follower, a “lowly” position of a follower should not simply be giving away everything to somebody else in some kind of complete self-erasure, but the follower should also be receiving the gifts of the leader, their protection, the benevolence of the leader, and the sense of expansiveness that the leader has.
The follower should be then receiving this.
And that seems to be like the more complete relationship between people.
Not to simply have one giving and the other receiving, but to have both giving and receiving in whatever is best and most useful for them, what they’re best able to give and most need to receive.
So these faculties of giving and receiving: it seems like we all have both of them, and we can all use both of them in our relationships.
We need to be able to give and be able to receive.
For some people, it seems, some people are a lot more comfortable with only one of those two modes, maybe only giving, only receiving.
Some people are happy to just sacrifice everything for somebody else, but when somebody wants to do something for them, they somehow feel uncomfortable.
They’re not able to accept.
Like “No, no, no.
I don’t deserve that.
That’s not for me.” And of course, others, we all know those that simply like to take.
They don’t want to give anything.
That’s just, well, “That’s not what I do.
I’m the big boss.
I take, you know, and you work for me.” And simply taking what others give, not giving anything back.
Either of these two modes, it seems, is incomplete, and there can’t be a complete exchange and interaction between people.
So which of these two modes are you more comfortable with? And how can you develop the other mode as well? Somehow- and maybe it’s different in different aspects of life as well.
Some people very comfortable giving in one area and not in another.
Same with receiving.
But maybe if we can develop both these areas into completeness, then we can really have a full interchange with everybody that we meet.
So maybe we can think about, you know, for everybody, what can I give and what can I receive? And that way we can have a complete interaction.
#giveandreceive #leadership #giving