I talked about the idea of giving and receiving, that we have to do both in order to have a complete interaction between people.
But it seems like this is also something that we can apply to ourselves.
We have within ourselves both of these modes of being, and even within ourselves can apply both of them.
So you know, the idea of sort of being a leader and a follower within ourselves: we can lead ourselves, we can demand from ourselves, we can control ourselves, in a way, like a leader, where you know, we sometimes have to make ourselves do things that we’d really rather not do, push ourselves to do things beyond what we really feel like it, and we can kind of be like the boss, the leader of ourselves.
So that’s one mode.
If we don’t have this mode at all, then how do we make ourselves do things that we don’t want to? Then, you know, then without this mode of operating within ourselves, then we could simply just do whatever we feel like doing.
So if we’re having a bad day and don’t feel like working, then we simply won’t work.
In fact, why work at all, unless it actually is directly satisfying and fun to do? So this mode allows us to control ourselves like we are our own employee.
But then the other side of it is, well, what about if we’re going to be- if we’re going to allow ourselves to be controlled, we need that other side that’s actually going to do it.
We need to actually follow this leadership of ourselves.
We need to, although we’re the boss making the command, but we’re also the employee that has to carry out the command.
And there that’s maybe not quite as fun as being the one who makes the decisions.
Instead OK, you’re the one that actually has to get the work done, do the work that the executive part of ourselves has decided that must be done.
So then we simply have to do the work, sometimes very unglamorous, maybe unrewarding grunt work.
We have to also carry that out.
So we need to be both the leader and the follower within ourselves to get things done.
If we’re only the leader, then we never get the work done.
If we’re only the follower, then we never have any direction anyway and just do what we want.
And the same applies with the idea of giving and receiving.
We can give to ourselves, when we are feeling like you know, we’re maybe missing something, we need some help, we need some comfort, we need some support, we can support ourselves like a friend, really.
And I think often it’s helpful to think of ourselves as a friend and think, well, how would you treat that friend? It seems like that’s helpful for some people who don’t take care of themselves, sometimes can be very generous to others but not to themselves.
But imagine taking care of yourself as if you were your friend.
How would you treat yourself if you were that other person who’s your friend? So that’s the giving to ourselves, but at the same time, we can also receive from ourselves, in terms of you know, we make ourselves do something.
We make ourselves work for something that we want, and then we receive the results of that.
So it certainly is kind of an abstract way of looking at it, imagining giving and receiving within ourselves.
Sometimes feels kind of circular, because you know, well you’re giving, but it’s the same person, so you’re giving and you’re also receiving.
But again even within the one person, it seems like thinking about both these modes, it seems like it can be helpful to have a complete picture, a complete way of operating.
We need to be able to both give to ourselves and take from ourselves.
We need to be able to both lead ourselves and follow ourselves.
So as always I’d be curious to hear what you think about this idea.
#giveandreceive #givetoyourself #giving