So I don’t know if it’s the season, Christmas season, end of the year, this sort of artificial deadline that wanting to get things in a good state by the end of the year, the feeling of coming up to the end, or maybe it’s just the new normal, but it just seems like there are so many things to do.
There is such a long list.
And I know that this is not an uncommon thing at all there are just so many things to do, and there’s such a list of things to be concerned about, and things I have to work on, and sometimes it just bothers me how big that list is.
And that’s one of my favorite things to do in recent days, has been trying to organize everything, organize all of this list, all the things that I need to be concerned about, so that I can somehow get to this mythical state of being at the end of the list.
Can you imagine that? Getting to the very end of the list of problems, of to-dos, of things that need attention.
It usually seems like a normal state to just have this kind of indefinite, vague list of problem, problem, problem, to-do, to-do, to-do, with no foreseeable end.
And I just like to imagine this idea of having this list written out, organized, and eventually I get to the point where, wow, that’s it.
I have nothing more to add.
I have no other problems.
I have no other to-dos.
That is the complete list of everything that I need to be concerned about at this moment.
And, of course, every day brings with it in the inbox of new problems and new to-dos, and so the list can never be fully empty.
But it seems to me to be a big step to be able to get to the end of that list and then look at it as “That’s it”.
So that this kind of nagging sense of what else do I need to do? What else is there? The feeling that no matter how much I achieve, how much I get done, there is always something else popping up that is demanding attention.
And even now, just in my mind, even as I said that sentence the, thoughts of some to-dos, you know, crept into my mind.
Oh, I have to do that thing, I have to do that thing.
So it just seems like there’s these to-dos and problems floating around and just popping up anywhere, like oh, remember about that, oh, you forgot about this thing, oh, got to do that thing.
It can really start to seem like it’s an endless number.
But I believe that it is not.
I believe that, just as our lives are finite, our existence as mortal beings, as human beings as these living creatures, we have a finite existence.
And as much as that’s usually a bit of a downer, because life is such a great thing to be able to experience that the thought of it having to end before very long is a bit of a downer.
And yet there is an upside, in the sense that, just as our lives are finite, our list of problems is finite.
There is an end, just like there’s an end to our lives.
Both in space, as in we only exist within this little slice of the universe.
Even if we travel around, we’re still in this little thin slice of space-time.
We are limited in space.
And of course, we are limited in time, for the number of days in our lives.
There’s an end.
And there’s also an end to anything that we need to be concerned about so I find that reassuring.
Now, it’s it’s a long way from that to actually reaching the end of that list, but I believe that there is an end, and it’s simply a matter of being able to clearly get them all out into this list.
And that’s what I’m working on now: getting everything that I might need to be concerned about all out into a list.
And then looking forward to that point where I can say I have completed that list.
And of course, the details: it can get into pretty small details, but, I mean, in the major areas, we have to take care of health, take care of family, friends, have to take care of income, have to develop something useful, meaningful work that will make the world a better place in some way.
But those are the basics, I think, really, for me.
If I can maintain my health, so sleeping, eating, exercising, medical care, basic maintenance with my health.
Then I have support of the people in my life.
Family, friends.
Make sure they’re being supported.
Then I have to make sure I get enough income to be able to live and support myself.
And as part of that, buying the necessary things, like buying food, and everything I own has to be, you know, gear has to be maintained and replaced.
And then beyond that, the main thing that I need is to develop work that is something that I can be proud of, something that I think will be a good thing for the world in some small way, something that will help people in some way, somehow make the world a little bit better.
It seems like all my problems and all my to-dos can more or less be fit into those areas.
If I can maintain standards in those areas, take care of them. […]